Monday, November 19, 2007

a HUGE thanksgiving tip

Thanksgiving is almost here and many of you are scrambling to find the right ingredients to a hugely happy family meal. Is it the $100 turkey? A honey-baked ham? Roast duck? Goose? Oyster stuffing? Cranberry fool? Too much wine?

It's different for everyone, but one of the keys to less stress at holiday time is to be prepared. Don't slave in the kitchen for most of the day just so everyone can be stuffed to the gills by the second-half of the second game of the doubleheader of a game that doesn't matter. Or does it? Who's playing anyway? You can bet the Lions will be somewhere in the mix. And the C-boys? do we have to put up with their swagger? Probably so.

The realization at 10 am on Thursday that you've forgotten the ONE ingredient that you absolutely must have is about as dreadful as snagging the 50-ft inflatable Lucy on the light pole. All the holiday air goes up and away.

It's pretty hard to forget the turkey, although I suppose it's been done. But what WILL you forget this year? You know you'll forget something. Cinnamon? Heavy cream? Fresh garlic? And just try and find these items at your local convenience store on Thursday. Likely isn't going to happen.

The absolute worst thing to run short on when you have a house full of guests who, after a HUGE meal, more than one glass of wine, several helpings of desert, and COFFEE, are ready to let go with some pent-up holiday stress is toilet paper. You can substitute 2% for heavy cream, but for toilet paper there are no good substitutes. Camping in the woods you can improvise this oversight, but on Thanksgiving you do not want to go there, not if you want Aunt Edna to come back for Christmas dinner.

That's why this year, just in time for the whole clan, Scott is introducing the SUPER-MEGA roll. This roll is so big you'll never have to change it no matter how free your guests feel. And the elders will love the ultra-doux, quadruple-ply, lanolin-enriched, SUPER-MEGA roll. If there's one place you don't want to be politically correct it's here. The SUPER-MEGA roll dwarfs the standard roll.

Look at it! It's ten times the size of a standard roll. Each SUPER MEGA roll contains 2000 quadruple-ply sheets compared to the standard sheet 200 single-ply roll. It's like having a small tree in your bathroom. Plus there's the equivalent of 1 sheep's worth of lanolin in each roll. So that's like having a small tree and a sheep in your restroom. Your guests will love you.

Don't entertain this year without at least one SUPER-MEGA roll. And for the day after why not try the all-new Clorox® ToiletWand™ System? It's clickable.

elsewhere:
the $100 turkey
all new clickable wand

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