Friday, December 21, 2007

what the funk up with dat?

Mayor Mark Funkhouse took the stage this week with his improvisational version of NNIICCEE, although it was more a gesture of composure and lack of performance. The weekly gig also starred Vincent Gallo, and together they made a mess of jamming, mostly on their knees as they couldn't quite find the right melody to satisfy their constituents nor get much satisfaction from the crowd. Some audience members yawned, some were nonplussed, but more were down-right obnoxious with the heavy-handed criticism such as, "rank avatars, the both". The consensus reaction could best be described as "What the Funk just happened?"

Wouldn't it just make more sense to talk about what you plan on doing first, try to set the stage a little bit, and then have a go at it? I guess the notion that the voters "elected the council to use our brains" has now expired. You would think that the Mayor rolling over on the Bannister Mall super-tiff would have garnered more support than an awkward, last-ditch lawsuit proffered by the Mayor Pro-tem.

Lots of things around here need changing; why the Funk do you think he got elected in the first place? But the power structure isn't going to go down easily. The fact that minorities stood behind City Manager Wayne Cauthen in Funk's effort to oust him, is just another example of people doing what's not in their best interest. If someone can tell me how having the City Manager in a 25-year tax-abated condo helps the poor, or how the advent of several hundred crappy stadium food service and parking lot jobs in downtown helps minorities, then bring on the salsa, I'm ready to tango.

On the flip side, for all the front-porch sitting in the company of friends and a malted beverage that the Mayor's been doing, he could use some advise from the other side - the side that 3-steps to hard liquor and hard work. One of the campaign promises that Mark made was that he was going to surround himself with people who agreed with him, as well as those who didn't agree with him. Seems like he's waited a little too long to find those that disagree with him because they keep turning up in council chambers and either casting votes against him, or publicly castigating him. Worst, these Christians are likely to be stingy with the forgiveness. It's going to take more than eggnog to make this Council sound mellifluous again.

nniiccee funky porch
the band rriiccee

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