Friday, August 29, 2008

she makes me feel so young

McGruff the Crime Dog attempted to cement the geezer white men vote by selecting a former beauty queen and Miss Congeniality, Alaskan Governor Sarah Palin, to be his Vice-Presidential running mate. We knew he a thing for Bullocks, but this is carrying it a bit far.

Gov. Palin doesn't believe the global warming models are "reliable" but does think Jesus can save bin Laden from the deep grip of Al Qeada. Two things are required of any Republican who seeks the nation's highest office. Stay on message and lie. Or perhaps they're just dull. Palin's observations on global warming are especially vain in light of recent evidence that the least amount of Arctic sea ice ever measured in the past 30 years was measured this summer (by next week may it may well turn out to be the least). Considering that she's governor of a state that relies, in part, on an Arctic ecosystem for sustenance and frozen tundra to support the Alaskan pipeline, this strikes us as, well, most Republican.

Poor McCain. If he could pull his arms out of the Bush adminstration's ass and lift them to his shoulder, perhaps Palin would take him moose hunting. Or they could hunt polar bears swimming for their life in the open water. The sooner we kill all the bears, the sooner we don't have to protect them. I guess Cheney, one man who's never tired of killing things, will have to go in McCain's stead.

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