Monday, June 30, 2008

flance recieves maillot t-shirt



Is a dream a lie if it don't come true or is it something worse? Bruce Springsteen


Flance, aka Floyd Landis, lost his last appeal of his 2006 superhuman ascent of Le Tour today leaving him with only the Maillot Jaune t-shirt. Flance's fall from grace has all the earmarks of an epic tragedy in the making, although it would seem the end has yet to be written.

For those of you who have forgotten, this year's edition of Le Tour begins on Saturday the 5th - without Team Astana, which means without the best team and the defending champion. We'll see if anyone watches without the dopers.

cloaked in patriotism

Barack Obama was in Independence, Missouri today saying you don't have to wear a flag-lapel pin to be a patriot and then he wears one anyway! When's a politician in this country going to have the guts to tell people they're friggin' stupid with the 'git her done' mentality?

If we're going to require candidates to wear a lapel pin, then shouldn't we also require them to have a Precious Moments "America You're Beautiful" figurine on the dash? on their desk? in their shower?

Sunday, June 29, 2008

force mulberry


Here's why it's a good idea to paddle when the river's up, or in flood stage - the overflow channel. A quiet place, except for the birds, turtles, snakes, beavers, muskrats, logjam riffles, and the occasional plink, plink, plink of mulberries dropping on your boat. Overflow channels, as the name implies, are largely inaccessible except during high water and because they lie at the interface of woods and river, they are teeming with wildlife. The also offer shelter from the sun and wind which are just beginning their summer-time impersonation of an industrial blow-dryer.

Find an overflow channel near you and practice your forward sweep.

Saturday, June 28, 2008

art of the car concours: cycles, touring sedans, and micro-cars


1915 Indian Motorocycle


Triumph


1959 German engineering, the Isetta

Friday, June 27, 2008

the year of living biblically

I've been reading The Year of Living Biblically by A.J. Jacobs, who's at least a big a skeptic as am I when it comes to religion. The book is interesting and funny and gives ample justice to the wacky parts of the bible as well as the more serious ones. The gist of the The Year of Living Biblically is that Jacob (his bible name) tries to live the book as literally as possible for 365 straight days. It sounds easier than it is, even if you're trying real hard to do it.

Of course, once it's been decided that one will live biblically then one first has to decide what that means. Old School or New School? Deuteronomy or Matthew? Abraham or Jesus? Torah, King James Revised, or the Good Word? Pick and choose, or take it all? During Jacob's spiritual journey he consults all sorts of biblical scholars and viewpoints from Ezekial to Marcus Borg, to Leviticus, to a Shatnez tester, to Appalachian snake-handlers. It fun, thought-provoking, and quietly inspirational.

That spirit, the spirit of being biblical, is what purportedly led the Chassid, Matisyahu (literally gift of God), to take up singing reggae, rap, and rock to the misaligned youth of today. It couldn't have been the kosher kitchen (because they don't keep one) that led him to Grinders Sculpture Park this week. Technically the venue name is CrossRoads KC at Grinders but on Tuesday, Matisyahu was there intoning Bob Marley, the Grateful Dead, and Rabbi Shlomo Carlebach just after the sun went down. His voice seemed a little over-worked but like A.J.'s book, it was a nice summer breeze. Due to the all-ages nature of the show, the air was full of cell-phone cameras, patchouli, and home-grown.

And because ticket sales were slow, CrossRoads offered a last minute, golden, two-for-the-price-of-one ticket. In the spirit of Jacob, I gave my extra ticket to the most devout looking person I could find hanging out near the gate, meaning the person with the most unkempt beard. He was either a rabbinical student or a homeless person, but he got a ticket to Matisyahu.

When the person at the gate asked for ID to prove I was 21, I grabbed my beard at the chin between my fist and said, "good enough?"

"No! Got to see ID."

"Pray for reason." I said.

Her partner slapped a wristband on me.

Once inside I looked up the diminutive impressario Stretch to see if kept a kosher kitchen. He smiled, "pepperoni's a problem." Then I went to the bar. "What do you got that's kosher?" I asked the waifish, tie-dyed, Bedouin behind the bar.

All I got was shrug. I'd have settled for a smirk. "Gin and tonic then with a lime twist. A double."

"You'd have thought they'd of had something!" said the person next to me in line.

I took the drink, tipped the barkeep and then told em both. "Boulevard Pale Ale is kosher. Check the bottle."

Maytisyahu fulfilled some standard myths and some non-standard ones. His head remained covered while in public even when jumping on and off the 8-ft. tall speakers (this small act sent the crowd into a tizzy; "Look, up in the sky, a Jew!"), tassels attached to the corners of his shirt, keeping the beard, and dancing and whirling about the stage like Tevye. From our vantage point at the front-row corner of the stage we were able to witness the roadie refilling Matishyahu's stage glass more than a few times with a cold malty beverage. No doubt the kosher Boulevard Pale Ale. A perfect summer, Reggaeton brew.

Thursday, June 26, 2008

En la sombra de La Giralda: blog con leche

My pal John, the only person I know with the work Jerk tatooed on his arm, has been on a teaching gig in Spain. His return to the states marks "the first time in his adult life that he's been proud of his country"[oh, wait, that's someone else's line], his chance to be forced to travel by automobile for simple errands that can easily be done by foot or mass transit in most other parts of the world, or his chance to make you realize that he's typically a lot more brutually honest about his feelings than moi.

In the Jerk's honor, we are turning the blagh over to him for a day. Read on ants!
__

As i sit here in Seville, Spain, feeling as if i've been beaten in the head with a brick, i can't help but complete my long overdue promise to inform the people who read this blog about something more than jerky. maybe it's the "heroic" (or maybe it was anti-heroic?) amount of booze i drank last night or the TONS OF FUN that i've been having, but something has flipped a switch and i now feel as if other people's wants do matter. strange, huh? i think i've used up a lifetime of leisure time and now all that's left is work.

i have been studying spanish for 19 of the 24 years of my life. i learned in an full-immersion environment and am completely convinced that it is the absolute best and easiest way to learn a language. that is why i am now in spain. i decided that it was time for me to immerse myself again so that i could recover the fluency that i had lost. the coolest part about being here and being an "adult" is that i now get to go to bars and hang out on the street with delinquents and hear people fight and swear and insult each other and generally have a good time. in spanish. learning how to swear is one of the most important parts of learning a new language. it doesn't matter if your grammar is good or not if you can insult someone's mother in their native tongue. i usually get bored with conversations that don't involve elaborate wordplay and mind numbingly stupid puns, so i often occupy myself with accumulating funny sounding turns of phrase. one of my personal favorites is the use of the word "leche" in spanish slang. if you've at all studied spanish in high school, you probably know that "leche" means milk. the main difference between europeans and americans is that europeans have been living in the same places for, like, more than 1000 years. this leaves a lot of time for linguistic drift (the forming of new languages/dialects) and a lot of time for expressions to evolve. of course, spanish folks have always had milk, so i imagine that it's use in slang is much older than just the last 40 years (cool, dude). here's a list of some phrases using "leche" and their equivalent english meanings:

"corred cagando leches" = "hurry the hell up"
"cago en la leche!" = "i fucked up"
"...a todo leche" = "all the way up" (kind of depends on what you're talking about. like, "the radio was turned all the way up")
"es la leche" = "it's the shit"

these are hilarious of you literally translate them:

"run shitting milks"
"i shit the milk"
"at full milk"
"it's the milk"

i have no idea how this usage came about, but it is infinitely entertaining. i can't stop myself from using it! now, my equivalent translations i used above may be a little strong considering the spanish versions are not necessarily considered swears, but they can carry a varying amount of force depending on how you use them. translating swear words is one of the most interesting things i've encountered in all of my language studies. i've spent the entire nine months i've been here trying to figure out a way to literally translate my favorite insult ("go fuck yourself") into spanish. it's not that hard to literally translate it, but yelling "vete a joder a si mismo" doesn't have a lot of art to it. it's much more effective to use the already common "vete al carajo!" or "vete a la mierda" which literally means "go to the boner" or "go to the shit" respectively. they each have the same force, but don't mean the same thing literally. it's all about matching the force of the expression instead of the meaning. another example would be using the word "fucking" as an adjective. in spanish, it's uncommon to say "el jodido presidente" (which literally means "the fucked president), but it's really common to say "el puto presidente" (literally meaning "the whore president"). "puta/o" means whore, but it is often used in the same way as we would use "fucking." now, these expressions are much closer in literal meaning to ours, but the "leche" ones can carry the same force as any of these depending on how you use them.

i know i was supposed to be here reading about Don Juan Manuel and the Archipreste de Hita and all that jazz, but i decided that was not something that interested me. it's never been that fun to study the dead parts of a language or a culture. i'm more interested in studying the living parts. it's the milk.

read more of the jerk's work at:
En la sombra de La Giralda

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

over the transom and under the radar

Don't hear much about people being vindicated after being erroneously charged under the so-call US Patriot Act so this one's for the Patriots who are still listening.

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Subject: ARTIST CLEARED OF ALL CHARGES IN PRECEDENT-SETTING CASE

CONTACTS:
Email: media@caedefensefund.org
Dr. Steven J. Kurtz: (716) 812-2968
Lucia Sommer, CAE Defense Fund: (716) 359-3061
Edmund Cardoni, Hallwalls Contemporary Arts Center: (716) 854-1694

ARTIST CLEARED OF ALL CHARGES IN PRECEDENT-SETTING CASE
Department of Justice Fails to Appeal Dismissal
Kurtz Speaks about Four-Year Ordeal

Buffalo, NY--Dr. Steven Kurtz, a Professor of Visual Studies at SUNY at Buffalo and cofounder of the award-winning art and theater group Critical Art Ensemble, has been cleared of all charges of mail and wire fraud. On April 21, Federal Judge Richard J. Arcara dismissed the government's entire indictment against Dr. Kurtz as "insufficient on its face." This means that even if the actions alleged in the indictment (which the judge must accept as "fact") were true, they would not constitute a crime. The US Department of Justice had thirty days from the date of the ruling to appeal. No action has been taken in this time period, thus stopping any appeal of the dismissal. According to Margaret McFarland, a spokeswoman for US Attorney Terrance P. Flynn, the DoJ will not appeal Arcara's ruling and will not seek any new charges against Kurtz.

For over a decade, cultural institutions worldwide have hosted Kurtz and Critical Art Ensemble's educational art projects, which use common science materials to examine issues surrounding the new biotechnologies. In 2004 the Department of Justice alleged that Dr. Kurtz had schemed with colleague Dr. Robert Ferrell of the University of Pittsburgh Graduate School of Public Health to illegally acquire two harmless bacteria cultures for use in one of those projects. The Justice Department further alleged that the transfer of the material from Ferrell to Kurtz broke a material transfer agreement, thus constituting mail fraud.

Under the USA PATRIOT Act, the maximum sentence for these charges was increased from five years to twenty years in prison.

Dr. Kurtz has been fighting the charges ever since. In October 2007, Dr. Ferrell pleaded to a lesser misdemeanor charge after recurring bouts of cancer and three strokes suffered since his indictment prevented him from continuing the struggle.

KURTZ SUMS UP END OF FOUR-YEAR NIGHTMARE
Finally vindicated after four years of struggle, Kurtz, asked for a statement, responded stoically: "I don't have a statement, but I do have questions. As an innocent man, where do I go to get back the four years the Department of Justice stole from me? As a taxpayer, where do I go to get back the millions of dollars the FBI and Justice Department wasted persecuting me? And as a citizen, what must I do to have a Justice Department free of partisan corruption so profound it has turned on those it is sworn to protect?"

Said Kurtz's attorney, Paul Cambria, "I am glad an innocent man has been vindicated. Steve Kurtz stared in the face of the federal government and a twenty-year prison term and never flinched, because he believes in his work and his actions were those of a completely innocent man. Clients like him are a blessing, and although I have had many important victories, this one
stands at the top of the list."

As coordinator of the CAE Defense Fund, a group organized to support Kurtz from the beginning of the case, Lucia Sommer sees the end of the prosecution as bittersweet, and like Kurtz, is thoughtful about the broader significance of the case: "This ruling is the best possible ending to a horrible ordeal--but we are mindful of numerous cases still pending, and the grave injustices perpetrated by the Bush administration following 9/11. This case was part of a larger picture, in which law enforcement was given expanded powers. In this instance, the Bush administration was unsuccessful in its attempt to erode Americans' constitutional rights."

Referring to the international outcry the case provoked, involving fundraisers and protests held on four continents, Sommer said, "The government has unlimited resources to bring and prosecute these kinds of charges, but the accused often don't have any resources to defend themselves. This victory could never have happened without the activism of thousands of people. Supporters protested, vocally opposed the prosecution, and refused to let it go on in silence. And without their efforts at fundraising, Kurtz and Ferrell would not have been able to defend themselves from these false accusations."

Sommer added that the next step for the defense will be to get back all of the materials taken by the FBI during its 2004 raid on the Kurtz home, including several completed art projects, as well as Dr. Kurtz's lab equipment, computers, books, manuscripts, notes, research materials, and personal belongings. The four confiscated art projects are the subject of an exhibition entitled SEIZED on view at Hallwalls Contemporary Arts Center in Buffalo, NY, through July 18: http://www.hallwalls.org/visual_shows/2008/show_seized.html .

BACKGROUND TO THE CASE
The case originated in May 2004, when Kurtz's wife Hope died of heart failure as the couple was preparing a project about genetically modified agriculture for the Massachusetts Museum of Contemporary Art. Police who responded to Steve Kurtz's 911 call deemed the Kurtzes' art materials suspicious and alerted the FBI. Kurtz explained that the materials (legally and easily obtained basic life science equipment and two harmless bacteria samples) had already been displayed at museums throughout Europe and North America with absolutely no risk to the public. However, the following day, Kurtz was illegally detained for 22 hours on suspicion of bioterrorism, as dozens of agents from the FBI, Joint Terrorism Task Force, Homeland Security, Department of Defense, ATF, and numerous other law enforcement agencies raided his home, seizing his personal and professional belongings. After a federal grand jury refused to charge Kurtz with bioterrorism, Kurtz and Ferrell were indicted on two counts of mail fraud and two counts of wire fraud concerning the acquisition of of harmless bacteria for one of Critical Art Ensemble's educational art projects. (Critical Art Ensemble is the recipient of numerous awards for its projects, including the prestigious 2007 Andy Warhol Foundation Wynn Kramarsky Freedom of Artistic Expression Grant, in recognition of twenty years of distinguished work:
http://www.creative-capital.org/index2.html .)

The Department of Justice brought the charges in spite of the fact that the alleged "victims of fraud"--American Type Culture Collection and the University of Pittsburgh--never filed any charges or complained of any wrongdoing, and the fact that in bringing the charges the Department of Justice was acting completely outside its own Prosecution Policy Relating to Mail Fraud and Wire Fraud(http://www.usdoj.gov/usao/eousa/foia_reading_room/usam/title9/43mcrm.htm ).

For more information and extensive documentation, including the Judge's dismissal, please visit: http://caedefensefund.org
***

matisyahu: visual reviews of aural entertainment


matisyahu, grinder's sculpture park, kansas city, mo.
June 24th, 2008 estimated attendance 1200, not counting the rabbi's (who got in free).


other reviews in the series:
m.o.i.: eldar
m.o.i.: elvis costello and the attractions
m.o.i.: the police
m.o.i.: the swell season
m.o.i.: anne-sophie mutter
m.o.i.: pat metheny trio
m.o.i.: mars volta and isabel bayrakdarian

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

obamaites respond to charlie black

In response to the recent comments by Charlie Black, senior campaign advisor to Senator John McCain,whereby he suggested that McCain would benefit from another 9/11-like terrorist attack, several Obama supporters responded, "Oh yeah? Well the Obama campaign would benefit if John McCain were to be captured by Al Queda and held for another 6 years as a prisoner-of-war!"

don't try this at home

Last weekend I inadvertently tried to kill myself with food poisoning. When the sign says $10 off per pound for Alaskan Coho Salmon, it's not always a good idea to buy it, even if the fish passes the smell test, the color test, and the firmness test. And if you cook it rare, like you can with high quality fish, then you're taking your life in your own hands. Oh, and if you save the leftovers and scramble them the next morning with a couple of eggs, yep you got it, you're going to be using the 7 words you can't say on television for the next 24-48 hours. Repeatedly.

One thing the experience did teach me though is how inter-connected your intestinal system is with the rest of your body. If you place a toxin in your stomach and it migrates to your intestinal tract and god forbid starts replicating, the entire rest of your body will freak out.

"AhhOOOgah. AhhOOOgah. AhhOOOgah. We've got a major problem in sector 5." "Roger. Cease all motor skills, shut down the cooling system, increase the heart rate, AND NO ONE SLEEPS till we get a handle on this!"

"Eye. Captain, but it's not working, sector 5 is on failsafe."

"Expunge! Expunge! Expunge!"


But you can say them on the internet. Funny how free speech works.

Monday, June 23, 2008

B'Tselem: shooting back with images



Video from the Israeli Information Center for Human Rights in the Occupied Territories project called "Shooting Back." They supply video cameras to people that live in the occupied territories in order to document human-rights abuses that frequently occur against Palestinians by the occupied forces.

For the record they are against all forms of indiscriminate violence, including that by Palestinian reactionaries. Watch this video about children living in a cave (there are even more disturbing ones at the B'Tselem web site) and think it about as you listen to the Presidential candidates begin to court the Jewish vote for the upcoming election. We need a sane policy toward the Middle East, and that would be have to different that one we've been operating under for the last 8 years. To assume that the Israelis can do no wrong is to assume that neither can the Palestinians. We know this isn't true.

B'Tselem in Hebrew literally means "in the image of," and is also used as a synonym for human dignity. The word is taken from Genesis 1:27 "And God created humans in his image. In the image of God did He create him." It is in this spirit that the first article of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights states that "All human beings are born equal in dignity and rights."
[OK, forget the sexist language, it was a different time.]

Elsewhere:
b'tselem

Sunday, June 22, 2008

are your neighbors a terror? then turn them in!

I received the following recently from my community policeman.

My favorite line, "In today’s world, many of us observe situations linked to the activities or support of terrorism that go unreported to law enforcement officials." Uhh, really. Please name one that's gone upreported? Other than the war itself?
--------------------------------------------------

To my Community Partners; yesterday I attended a meeting with Captain Mike _____ and Officer Shawn _____, Homeland Security Unit regarding the training of community members on understanding, identifying and documenting possible terrorist activity. In today’s world, many of us observe situations linked to the activities or support of terrorism that go unreported to law enforcement officials. Central Patrol would like to present two open training sessions for the community and looking for partners to host such training. A day class and early evening class would allow all the opportunity to attend. If your organization has the space and willing to host such an event, please contact me to discuss possible dates. The training will be provided as a free service from the KCPD Homeland Security Division and will be open to all in the public. Once the dates are set, I will send an invitation for all to attend.

-------------------------
My friend Pete has volunteered to hold the meeting in the anthrax lab he created in the basement of the children's bookstore. All I can say is that he needs to find some different cows (suggest bloated carasses floating in Mississippi flood waters) from which to harvest his strain since none of his children have managed yet to die, or even get sick, although they do complain a lot when they don't get ice cream at least once a week from Murray's. One can't fault them for that - it is summer after all.

Image: Roy M. Cohn and Senator Joseph McCarthy conferring during the Army-McCarthy hearings / World Telegram & Sun photo by Herman Hiller. Library of Congress Prints and Photographs Division. New York World-Telegram and the Sun Newspaper Photograph Collection.

suit doesn't fit? get a new life or

Time to resign.










Scott McCellan on the day of his resignation.














Karl Rove on his last day at the White House.

Boy! Being a lap dog really makes it difficult to keep off the pounds.

Image: McCellan. Jim Watson, Agence France Presse - Getty Images.

Saturday, June 21, 2008

to the picnic!

Wow! We thought we'd take a few days off, recover, and then get back to biz. Seems like Ma Bell had other ideas for us. Today we got a new phone line, from the pole to the house, which seemed to fix the 2 shorts in the wire that had developed over the last 40 or so years of dangling in the trees. So our smart-alecky self is back.

Jeez. We've missed a few things. To wit.

Senator Clinton finally threw in the towel.

Big Brown ain't so big anymore.

Tiger Woods won the US Open with a bad knee AND A BROKEN LEG!

Barack Obama, friend of the people, decides to eschew the populist approach to funding elections that utilizes $3 contributions in favor of $200 ones.

I wish I could say that we've been writing furiously off-line, banking blog posts like squirrels bury acorns, but that's not the case. No, we've been doing other things, and frankly haven't really missed posting that much. We have missed the daily writing and the discipline involved.

So be forewarned. We're crawling out the hole. And we're armed. With the few words that we know.

Thursday, June 5, 2008

wild alaskan salmon jerky


Unless you're a grizzly bear (Ursus arctos horribilis) you're going to have a hard time getting your fill of wild Alaskan salmon. Especially if you live in the lower 48. That would also apply if you were one of the few hundred grizzlies who live down south. The Pacific coast salmon runs have been on the decline in the last years. They are getting dangerously low. We can dispute the causes in another post. This year, the season was cut short in much of the northwest part so as to allow (hopefully) the population to better recover. But really, the place to go for pacific salmon, the Chinook salmon, the King salmon, is Alaska. when the salmon are running from the sea back up the rivers to spawn. A process that takes 4-5 years to happen since they spend most of their life at sea.

We are not talking about the pale-pink farmed raised Atlantic salmon. No. Alaskan King salmon meat is fluorescent in comparison that pablum. Farmed-raised salmon is akin to commercially-raised tomatoes - not worth eating. And the difference between the wild and the farmed-raised fish is in the wild diet of shrimp that the salmon gorge on. It also makes a huge difference in taste, texture, and fat content of the meat. By comparison the Atlantic salmon is mealy and bland when compared to the King Salmon. Don't believe me? Try taking one away from the next grizzly bear you see? They'll set you straight.

There are only a few ways to obtain the wild Alaskan King salmon. Take a trip to Alaska and fish it out of the river. Expensive, but fun. Do a Timothy Treadwell and try taking some away from a grizzly. Fun? Maybe, but definitely dangerous. Have someone ship you some fresh salmon from the West Coast. Not as expensive, not as fun. Or, wait for the 2-3 week season during the year when you can actually buy it fresh from a fish monger in the Midwest and start gorging. Still expensive (currently about $25-30 pound) but what else are you going to do?

If you're like me and you like to stock up for the coming apocalypse (John McCain may yet be elected President so it's a definite possiblity) then one thing you can do is preserve some of that wild flavor for the times when you might want to snack in the wilderness (or the bomb shelter). Yes, you could freeze the salmon, but if you want to take it, for example on a backpacking, or river trip, then frozen isn't the best. So why not make jerky out of it?

If you go to Alaska, you'll find all sorts of great purveyors of smoked fish. Salmon, halibut. They know the deal and they know how to do it well. Great succulent stuff, but not really preserved to be kept unrefrigerated. I'm talking real portable food here. The kind that requires no refrigeration (more on that later). So then how do yo do it?

Here's how. It's really pretty simple because it's based on very simple, and very old techniques.

Wild Alaskan Salmon Jerky.

Ingredients.
3-5 pounds of very fresh, firm Alaskan Salmon.
1/2 lb honey.
Tablespoon of toasted sesame oil.
1/2 cup of grape seed oil.
3 sprigs of fresh rosemary.
Kosher salt.
Food dryer.

You can do this with the skin on, or off. I like to remove the skin (and the bloodline), it's a little more work, but generally when I'm out in the woods I don't want to have to dispose of salmon skin (just in case there's bears in the woods!)

Wash the salmon thoroughly. Then drain.
Heat the honey, oils and fresh rosemary together. Cool to room temp.
Place the salmon into a glass or stainless dish.
Cover the salmon completely with COOLED honey and oil mixture. The fish should be completely submerged. Cover the dish and refrigerate overnight for 12-24 hours.

When you remove the salmon from the refrigerator you should notice a distinct change in the texture of the fish. The curing process has begun and curing is just another way of cooking. The flesh will have darkened and firmed.

Now drain the fish on a rack. Cut into pieces 1 inch by 3 inches. The pieces can vary but the more uniform, the more uniform the drying. You can make difference size pieces if you want. If you cut them too small, they will become brittle, rather than retain some moisture. You don't have to, or want to, pull all the moisture out. At 18 percent or below moisture content, it will be preserved.

Sprinkle kosher salt in a clean dish and then place the salmon pieces on them. Roll them to coat each side. Here you can alter the amount of salt depending upon how you'll use the final product. Salt is very important to the curing and keeping of the meat, but too much and it's, well salty. The less salt you use, the more apt for spoilage. If this is going in the fridge and never in the field, then you can cut way back on the salt and once you dry it, it'll be fine. You could also eschew the drying and go for smoking, which is generally what you find in the better shops in Alaska. Very delicately smoked fish that is very moist and tender. This product we are making, fish jerky, is something although together different than the smoked salmon you can buy in the dairy case at the local market. That requires constant refrigeration. And the difference between the two lies in the amount of water in each product.

The drying time varies considerably depending upon the dryer but typically it's going to take 12-18 hours. The fish shouldn't be so brittle as to crumble when done. It should have the texture of jerky, somewhat plastic. As it cools, it may become more brittle. The tendency is to overdue it; it's an expensive mistake. Any excess salt on the exterior can be brushed off when the drying is complete.

Now wrap the pieces in parchment or saran wrap then place these in an freezer bag and store in an airtight container in the fridge. Once the pieces are dried you want to keep any moisture from seeping back in. Moisture at this points brings in off flavors and promotes spoilage. When done this way they'll keep for 6 months. You can take out some pieces and carry you with them on hikes or trips and not have to refrigerate them. And not have to worry about spoilage either.

You got 3 diffent methods that you used to preserve this fish. A honey cure. A salt cure. And a drying cure. When your pals are snaking on little jimmies and you pull out some homemade dried salmon jerky, you'll be able to trade for anything you want on the trail, so bring some extra along.

In the future we'll explore a sublime entree that can be made from these salted, cured pieces of Wild Alaskan salmon.

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

time for a new stump speech


Dude. Finally. The Democrats get something done. 18 months of campaigning for the nomination and now there's another 6 months to go. When will we learn to shorten the process?

Now we have to listen to John McGruff the Crime Dog for the next 6 months try to tell us why we should fear the world. All we can say, is that if McGruff gets elected, he might want to fear his press secretary.

The difference in this campaign can be the images that shape our view of the candidates. It's hard to imagine the Republicans fostering any sort of visionary approach to image making. It's hard to imagine the Republican making progress. But that's what America wants. Progress.

I just listened to Hillary Clinton's so-called concession speech and all I can say is, "Groannnnn!"

Image: Obama poster by Shepard Fairey

Monday, June 2, 2008

warrior ant press joins the colony

Warrior Ant Press is taking an early summer hiatus. Actually, for those who may visit frequently, we've already been on one for a few days. Hey, it's summer. There's ample things to do beside hang out in front of the computer screen all day and night. We could join the colony of ants that finds its way somehow into the house every spring and have a picnic. And no amount of boric acid can deter these incessant pests. They just detour around it.

What else is newsworthy? Oh yeah. Our long shot didn't pay off. The media credentials are going elsewhere, perhaps the DNCC is a little leery of unleashing the power of warrior ants into a floor fight? Who knows. We've promised ourselves not to get all Clinton-bitter. We tried, which was the point. One thing it did do was force us to write every day, and there's much to be said for that. Now, time for a short break, recharge the batteries and find other things in life as, if not more interesting, than politics to yammer about. We'll still yammer about politics. How can you not?